The Car Incident 😳

 Not a lot of people tell stories that embarrass them, stories that crawl into their skin and their deepest wounds, stories that make them just don't want to exist anymore... But here I am, I'm going to tell you a story about the most embarrassing moment I've had in my 16 years of life.... 

It was a typical, mundane Thursday morning , the sun didn't shine as bright, it had a mid year kind of midst, and the birds didn't chirp as loud. 

I packed my bag and carried it with me as I entered the school's building. At this time, it was about 8am in the morning. 

I stepped into my class, still empty. The feeling of the cold aircon brushes against my cheeks as I unpack my books and lunchbox, getting ready for the day. I sat on my chair, feeling uneased. 

Oh god what is that feeling? 7 year old me couldn't properly tell. 

Oh right, I needed to go to the bathroom. 

However, it was almost time for class to start. What if I go back in late? 

But I really need to go! 

My 7-year-old debated her own thoughts over and over again. She stood there, staring at the clock. 

It read 8:56

"class starts at 9" I thought. 

Okay, there is no way I'm going to make it. I'll just go during break time"

And so as I thought.... 

During break time, I got distracted by my friends. We played in the playground for the whole of lunch time that I completely forgot to go and empty my bladders out. 

As the bell rang, I realized that I still haven't gone. So I thought, why not just hold it in until home time at 2?  I can do that right? As I walked away with doubt. 

Home time arrives. 

That day particularly, I was going home together with a classmate of mine. How fun! 

This scenario just couldn't get any better. It was one of those moments,where you are laughing your heads off with your friend and you two just keep adding to it, making you laugh even more. 

Two 7 year olds, sat in the car, laughing their minds off hysterically over stupid 7 year old jokes with one 7 year old who is completely busting, in need to go to the toilet and has been holding it in since 8 am in the morning. The time now reads at 2:30.

Not a very nice scenario.to think about, surely. 

As the driver turns the corner to my house. My friend, made the most stupid, absolute silliest joke my seven year old self could think about at that very moment. I told her to stop. 

Then she bursted out the weirdest, ugliest, most contagious laugh ever. 

And that's where I bursted... 

My pants were drenched. 

A freeing feeling got let out of me. 

I gasped in shocked, as I tried to hide the wet spot from my friend. She didn't notice the whole 2 minute of the ride as we pull up at my drive way. 

It wasn't until I jumped out of her car, trying to cover up the puddle on my skirt that my friend AND her driver noticed. 

"Nazwa, did you just pee your pants?!"

My mum ran over to me, her eyes eyeing my wet skirt. 

She let out a laugh and rubbed my shoulders. 

My face was red as a tomato, dripping with embarassment as I started at my friend who had her whole mouth wide opened, staring dead into my eyes in shock and disgust. 

"They were laughing way too hard", the driver told my mum as he bursted into a low laugh. 

I felt hideous. I felt humiliated.

But mostly, I felt dumb. 

Dumb because I knew better than to hold my pee the whole entire school day. 

I felt dumb because I knew for sure that going to the bathroom wouldn't take me 5 minutes. 

I felt dumb because I knew that going to the bathroom is a completely natural thing and that I wouldn't get in trouble, even if I was in class. 

My dark thoughts hid my face. 

Blanketed in humiliation, I told my friend what happened. She still looked shocked and disgusted. "You really peed in my car?!" She exhaled. 

I told her I was sorry and she forgave me, luckily. 

As my friend drove off, I held back my tears, my mum still giggling at me, telling me that is alright and that I have certainly learnt my lesson. 

And yes, she was right. I did. I really did. 

Never again will I hold my pee ever since then, especially when in public. I couldn't think of anything that could have made that exact scenario even more embarrassing,